Wednesday, October 23, 2013

I’ve Got a Crush on You

It started at some point in the 5th grade. I was elected class president for no apparent reason until I later found out that one of the boys in my class – Johnny -- had offered kids money to vote for me. A dime went a long way then. I was both horrified and flattered, but was determined to carry out my duties (few as they were) as class president. It was the first time anyone other than my mother had believed in me like that, and it was a powerful aphrodisiac (if only I had known the meaning of the word then).  Our love affair, which consisted of shy hellos and stolen glances, lasted through 5th grade. By 6th grade, my first crush had moved on to other girls, and, honestly I was a little relieved since neither of us had a clue how to be in a relationship. 

Fast forward to 9th grade when a new boy named Steve arrived at school. I had sworn that I would never love again because it just didn’t seem that interesting, but Steve broke my resolve. He was charming and confidant and every girl in 9th grade wanted to be his girlfriend. I found myself calling his house and hanging up (thank god caller ID didn’t exist then). One day at school – maybe the first time I had EVER worn a padded bra – Steve noticed me. Before long he was walking me home from school and asking me to go skate boarding or to a movie. I was in heaven every minute we were together, but I will never forget the day he kissed me. It was the first time anyone had ever French kissed me and I was NOT prepared. I didn’t even know what French kissing was. A few games of spin the bottle were not enough to teach me anything. I pushed Steve away in shock, not realizing that I would push Steve away for good. I was crushed and believed I would never find anyone like Steve again . . . but then came Eddie (more about him later). 

Reading the short love stories of FALLING IN LOVE. . . AGAIN, reminded me of Johnny and Steve and how we can all be blinded by a future we cannot begin to see. But it’s the not knowing, stumbling onto the unexpected, and discovering life’s delightful surprises that give us all hope. 

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