Thursday, July 10, 2014

A Hunk of Burning Love --Oh, Yeah!

By Ms. Teri
Years ago, I spent some time as the feature editor at a small-town Texas newspaper. I grew up in Florida so it was fun to pick up stakes and move to the bigger, broader, taller-tale-d flatlands of Texas. I still miss the barbeque and Tex-Mex restaurants there that served platters of food for one that would feed an entire herd of cowboys.

Every Friday night after work, a group of us would head out to a finger-lickin’, butt-kicking bar to toss back a few margaritas and some ribs. One night, my friend Laura had way too many margaritas and started telling funny stories about her husband. When the waitress brought our chips and guacamole, she brought a bowl of jalapeño peppers. I had never heard of jalapeños let alone tasted one, but I had had enough margaritas to bravely try one. That was my first mistake. My eyes were watering, my mouth was burning and my stomach felt like it was on fire. It was all I could do to sit there and pretend nothing was going on. I needed another margarita, fast!

Laura just laughed and proceeded to tell us about the time her husband Jim entered and won a jalapeño eating contest. They do things like that in Texas.  Although, I guess Florida is just as whacky, there were restaurants there that served “gator.” Laura’s story led to a competition among the group as to who had the funniest jalapeño story to tell, but it was Laura who topped them all.

She and Jim had been married for three years at the time and decided to celebrate their anniversary with margaritas and spicy Tex-Mex food. They both had more than enough to drink and had topped their tacos with jalapeños. By the time they got home, the food wasn’t the only heat they’d had that night. They were super hot for each other and wanted to celebrate their anniversary with a night of spicy lovemaking. But first, Laura needed to run into the bathroom to put in her diaphragm.

Who knew that the heat from touching those jalapeños would provide a LOT more spice than Laura bargained for from her diaphragm? She could not believe the heat. . . and the pain. She had to go to the emergency room and, on top of that, she had to explain to the doctors and nurses exactly what had happened to her.  It took weeks for her to recover, from the burn AND from the embarrassment. Jim had to take many cold showers, and their anniversary night of spicy food and lovemaking was a total bust.
I guess the moral of this story is that if you want to have a fun night of wild hot sex, don’t have jalapeños. Or, if you have jalapeños, be sure to wash your hands before you make love.

Yes, there is HOT love and then there is SIZZLING HOT love like the love stories in the TruLOVE Collection, WHEN LOVE SIZZLES. Laura, this one’s for you!

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